In The Meantime

Hey Lucid’s

I have always wanted to be a transparent person and share my experiences and thoughts because I believe in one form or another, we all are brothers and sisters and can learn from each-other which is why I started this blog some time ago. So being super honest and revealing about my life is important, I’m not ashamed to share my challenges I have faced, bad decisions I have made, or my fears. I believe it’s always someone that will receive my message.

Today I wanted to talk about ‘The Meantime” what does one do in the meantime when they are facing challenges in life or trying to get past pain, hurt, disappointment or simply dealing with self-criticism. Often when we turn to self-help books, we always see the beginning challenges of the author and the end which is their successful point. They rarely discuss their meantime and if they do, they are not transparent so you as the reader are often still confused once you have read their book. When I say the meantime, I mean how do we get through the moments when it’s hard for us to get out of the bed in the morning because we are hopeless, stressed, hurting, or unmotivated. How do we keep going when we are tired and mentally exhausted? How do we keep an attitude of gratitude when our world seems to be coming apart? It’s simple friends, allow yourself to feel it, go trough it, and deal with it. You can not bury what’s going wrong, you can’t drink or smoke it away, it will still be there when you sober up, you also can not mask it. You have to allow yourself to go through whatever it is and get past it.

True story, I recently experienced a loss that really broke my heart, I literally felt physical pain from this hurt. I was in a relationship and not a typical boyfriend and girlfriend type thing but a real relationship where I and he invested quite a bit of time, energy, and love, among other things. We had real intimacy, and not on just a sexual level.  We shared our goals, failures, wants, and fears. We were totally honest and vulnerable with each other and funny enough with all of those qualities we still struggled with communication which was highly important to me and not a big factor to him, this ultimately ended our relationship. I later found once we parted that all along, he was harboring all types of thoughts and feelings that I never knew existed. And while I knew that it was not my choice to end our relationship, and that I had given 110% of myself and heart to this person, I still questioned myself, what I did wrong, or if I could have changed this or that. When our break-up first occurred, it was more of a shock and I was trying to get answers, later the anger set in, but when that hurt hit, OMG guys, I thought my life was over because I had a wall up so tall when we met but later decided to allow him in and decided not to self-sabotage my relationships and be happy, I mean we were talking about marriage and I  felt as though I was finally secured in a relationship and it was my last after I am 41, who wants to still be dating. I can remember not being able to sleep, waking up crying in the middle of the night, texting, calling, and emailing him to just talk to me. I immediately ceased everything in my life outside of going to work, but even then, I would have to leave my desk and go to the bathroom to let it out and cry.

Honestly friends, today I am still working through it but I wanted to share my story because I noticed that allowing myself to feel the pain, cry it out, journal, and whatever else I needed at the time helped me to work through it. I still have my days like today where I shed a tear, but again I allowed myself to feel it and talked about it with a friend who allowed me to vent. I am still working through it and in my meantime and writing this blog is also a help, I say all of this to say, work on Your Meantime, do the work you need to do to be happy, at peace, and the best version of you. Don’t run, hide, bury, or mask your challenges. Deal with them, it will equip you to move past things much easier and faster or face the challenges or fear you need to face head on. The things that I have listed below helps me quite a bit and gives me the strength not only for my situation but in all areas of my life.

Practice an Attitude of Gratitude, write down the things you are grateful for versus what you don’t have or feel you are missing.

Remember your goals and your purpose, don’t lose sight of them

Pray your way through your hurt or fears and ask for guidance

And if you need to take a break, do it but jump back on the saddle and stay focused

See a therapist if need be

Help someone help, and make your heart smile

Have and Awesome Week,

Pretty Lucid……..

It’s Your Season, Pour Into Yourself!!!!

Hey Lucids,

It’s a new year and a new day….Before 2020 came in, you told yourself that this would be your year, so what steps have you taken to make your goals manifest? Some of us wanted to become an entrepreneur, lose weight, start furthering our education, become a homeowner, or even leave that bloody relationship that no longer serves us. Well I am here to tell you to do it, start with what you have today, and I am not just saying this to you, I am speaking to myself as well. I promised myself I would become a homeowner this year and lose weight, and guess what, I have taken the steps to start that process by taking a first-time home-buyer’s class and taking my butt to the gym. Baby steps, I am doing what I can with what I have right now.

Pour Into Yourself

For so long lots of us has been the support for someone else, be it our spouse, family members, kids, or friends. We forget to take care of ourselves in the process. Yes, we can get up in the morning and put on our nice clothes, style our hair, and spray on our favorite fragrances, but are we really okay? Or are we feeling like we take care of everything and everybody with no one to take care of us or be our shoulder. Are we feeling used and unappreciated? Did you know we could avoid feeling that way if we considered and loved on ourselves more? And I am not saying to not support your loved ones, but if you are not giving to yourself, how can you love, support, and pour into someone else, or expect them to do the same for you in return.

My message for you today is to Take Care of You, Make Yourself Happy, Heal Whatever is Stopping you from being the Best Version of Yourself. Stop looking at or comparing yourself to others and their timelines, it’s not yours, worry about your own self. Live in your own divine time, appreciate what God has given you today, so that he may bless you tomorrow. Also, know that it is perfectly okay to put yourself first. And it’s perfectly okay to tell others no if you have nothing to give, especially if it’s taking away from you. Take the steps you need to take today with whatever you have now, if you don’t do anything but write down your plans or your vision, pray for guidance, or ask for help. Start Today friends, let’s not allow the summer or the end of the year to arrive and have accomplished nothing, I’ll say it again Start Today, Start Tonight, Start Right Now…….It’s your time, pour into yourself….

Love,

Pretty Lucid

My Fibroid Story, Why I Chose a Hysterectomy!

Good Morning Ladies,

Women often deal with fibroids in silence and don’t talk much about them or deal with them for that matter, we just go along with life dealing with the harsh symptoms. I reached a point in my life where I could no longer ignore my fibroids, and I’d like to share my fibroid story and how I decided to get rid of them. I have included the link below to my YouTube page, please watch, tell me what you think, and lets talk about it.

Have an awesome Hump Day!

Have a Terrific Tuesday

Morning,
It’s “Transformation Tuesday” I know we all hate the start of a new week, however I also know that we all have plenty of goals and visions for #2020, so transform those Monday blues into having a “Terrific Tuesday” Work on your goals, vision, or yourself today…Make Monday jealous that Tuesday had a better you.

Have an awesome Day……

Helloooo February!

Good Morning Loves,

Welcome to the short month of February, the month of Love & Romance. And it’s Leap Year so we get one extra day…Let the Valentine Day planning begin.

Remember Valentines Day isn’t only about sharing love with a husband or wife, boyfriend and girlfriend or any other partners, it’s about spreading the Love. So if that means treating yourself, do it, if it means having a Valentines Dinner with the girls, do it. Whatever makes your heart smile this month, I’d say do it. “Be Good to Yourself “

Have an Awesome Saturday

#Pretty Lucid

I Started a New Business

Hey friends,

I know I have been out of sight for a while. Life has been pretty interesting for me since late last year, lots of changes. Some good, some bad, but such is life right…

Well one of the changes I made was entering the entrepreneur arena, I started an online store selling my Organic homemade Sugar Scrubs and Bath Salts among other items. It has been a slow startup, but good thus far.

Please check out my website at empressbodyessentials.com

If you decide to make a purchase, use Discount Code (Spring10)

Hope all is well with you all.

Thanks for Reading

Empress……

Guess who turned 40….

So I have hit my 40th year on God’s green earth and I can honestly say it doesn’t feel half bad. I used to think that I would feel a way about getting older, but no, I’m noticing the older I get, life actually gets better. So I’m looking for to many more years, God willing…

I couldn’t do a lot to celebrate my milestone due to me getting a promotion at work and not being able to take off for a birthday vacation which was my original birthday plan, to go on a cruise as I never have, but the training is a lot and long, so duty called. Nevertheless, I had a great dinner and got to see Maxwell in concert. “I love him”. He’s so talented.

Anyway I’m happy I’ve reached a good place in life. I’m gonna ride out these 40’s and take in my blessings.

Till next time,

Empress

Looking for Change…….

Hey friends, hope all is well with everyone. I know it has been quite some time since I have posted a blog, I have even lost quite a few followers due to my inconsistency. The truth is friends, I really don’t know what I want to do with this blog site. I go back and forward on if I want to create new and different content and revamp the blog, or if I want to let it go all together and focus on some of my other goals. And the reasoning for that is life is really changing for me right now, mostly in good ways, but of course with the good, always comes the bad. Not bad in harsh ways but bad as in having to accept and make changes in certain parts of my life and in my relationships. So bad as in growing pains I guess I could say.

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Just a couple of months ago, I woke up one morning and realized I was nearing 40 years old and I was not happy at all. Yes I have the things that I need in life and some that  I want, but I still wanted and still want different. I want to experience real and genuine happiness, freedom, love, and joy. Not the forced kind, or the kind where you convince yourself that you are happy to put up a front for others and especially social media or even to make your loved ones feel more comfortable. So wanting to experience this type of reality moving forward meant making some big changes in my life in all areas be it my relationships, career, education, health, and most importantly my mental health. The biggest challenge so far has been creating boundaries within my relationships because when I started to change, some people around me weren’t ready for me to change, that’s partly because I have always been the type of person that takes care of everything and everyone but myself. Truth be told I looked to fix everyone else and everything else, because I did not want to deal with myself.  I didn’t know where to begin. I did not know who I was, what I really wanted in life, and definitely what my purpose was in this life. So day by day and little by little I started to take a deep look at my life and what I wanted for it. I had to admit some hard truths within myself and accept some things in my life that I absolutely could not change, that started me om my freedom path. I am one who is very cautious and protective, in other words, I like control, lol…but then I realized I had to let go, and let God. I also had to learn to trust the process of letting go. Freeing myself from an over-thinking mind and from the stress it created, I have been able to feel happier and have more genuine experiences. Friends it’s all about getting out of your own way and taking responsibility for your own life, experiences, and happiness. The rest will take care of itself honestly, we just have to open up and let it happen. I am very near turning 40, but with the positive steps I have taken and is still working on, I am confident  that I will be stepping into the big 40 gracefully and happy….Till next time..

Empress….

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Are You Ready for the New Year?

New year 2018 loading blackboard drawing background     It’s the countdown to 2018. In a couple of days, we will be starting a New Year. All of our hopes, dreams, and goals will be created or renewed. And lots of us will consider getting rid of negative or in-genuine people who does not feed our souls. The New Year also brings about the heart or mindset to find ways to better ourselves or to regroup and start a new way of living, through diet, lifestyle, social circles, and finances. New Years Resolutions, lol ….I don’t believe in those. They go out of the window by the mid-January. Maybe some of us will stay consistent through February.  I believe at any time and any day we can choose to regroup and push that restart button. I also feel, if there are some changes that needs to be made, why wait till January 1st when you can start today right.

Well I can honestly say 2017 has been a year of enlightenment for me. Its been some high-lights and well, some lows too.  I’m not really one for change, but this year was the year of changes for me. I’m happy in some ways as it took me out of my comfort zone and forced me to deal with some things. It also created opportunities for me to excel into the woman I want to be.

I am using my last few days of the year to rethink my life and reorganize. Lots of things in life is changing before our eyes and we are starting not to live as we once did, meaning life seems to get more challenging and complicated with each day, which is mind-blowing and can be scary. I feel that although we should not take ourselves so seriously, it’s still a time where we need to carefully plan our futures in all areas of our lives whether its religion, finances, relationship’s, education, or the way we are raising our children and the influence they may be receiving.

Either way, whether we are prepared or not, the New Year is here. I am so excited and hopeful for so many things. I pray that all of you gained lots of wisdom this year that will have you prepared and set for 2018. I hope that you guys are enjoying your holiday season and Thank You so much for reading and supporting my blog even though I am not here often lol. See ya in 2018!!!!

 

Empress